Things not working for you? Do the opposite!
Remember the episode of Seinfeld where George Costanza laments the way his life has turned out? "If every instinct you have is wrong than the opposite must be right," Jerry counsels his friend. It starts with his order at the diner ... and the opposite-experiment snowballs from there.
If so many of us get the same results doing the same thing and ending up with something we don't want, why we keep doing those same things over and over?
It might show up in your life as failure (perceived or otherwise) around your writing. "I just can't finish a book," you wail to your writing group. "I want to but I can't find the time/get started/finish the manuscript/stop daydreaming (insert excuse here)"
Been there. Still doing that (frequently lately).
If we're writers, why aren't we writing?
Are you struggling to find the time to write? So many of my newsletter subscribers and blog readers have mentioned this particular struggle. (Of course, there's always The 15-Minute Novelist to help ...)
But is it really a time issue? It may very well be. There are many people who adore writing and simply lead lives that are too busy to add in one single thing extra.
Of course, it could also be a fear issue. We all have days when our big dreams seem very far away. Or when we're just plain avoiding something.
I've been "wanting" to start meditating for months now. Wanting being the key word. Notice the quotations? Because honestly, if I really wanted to meditate I would just do it already.
I avoid meditating because:
So maybe we can each try the opposite of what we normally do when we feel that familiar resistance and see what happens?
Instead of periodically smacking myself with the guilty words, "I really should learn to meditate," I could just do something completely opposite. Stand on my head? Learn to juggle? Bake a cake? Watch old Seinfeld episodes?
The trick is trying to figure out if the benefits of our new habit (writing, meditating, exercising, whatever) will outweigh the hard part of getting started.
My psychologist brain wants to delve more deeply into the whole fear/resistance thing, too. We'll be exploring that more in future posts. In the meantime, I'd love to hear about your greatest challenges to fitting writing into your life. Please share in the comments section.
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